


The Heart Shaped Pink

by anon_nim



Series: Color Me Pink [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Angst, Best Friends, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-10-24 19:43:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10748514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anon_nim/pseuds/anon_nim
Summary: Chanyeol has been declaring his love for Kyungsoo foryears; the flowers, countless ‘i love you’s, teasing and rings, whispers and smiles. It all means—“Kyungsoo? You know I love you, right?”—nothing?





	The Heart Shaped Pink

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry in advance.
> 
>  
> 
> This is betaed by Mel, I appreciate critics/comments/feedbacks or any wailing noises really, thanks for reading,  
> xoxo

They've just finished performing in Newark, New York for the Exordium tour and Chanyeol thinks everything went well. The fans are clearly ecstatic and despite the exhausted state they’re in now, Chanyeol knows for a fact that the members love their job, happy to see the fans chanting their names. Chanyeol can still feel his body buzzing with adrenaline, even now when they’re far from the stage, sitting in a van and seconds away from falling asleep. Chanyeol sighs, looking at Kyungsoo and smiling fondly when Kyungsoo yawns cutely for the umpteenth time.

“You tired?” Chanyeol whispers. 

Rubbing his eyes, Kyungsoo nods and let out another yawn. “Yeah. Lend me your shoulder will you?”

Chanyeol doesn't have time to say ‘yes’ - who he is to deny Kyungsoo’s innocent request? - because Kyungsoo is already leaning onto Chanyeol’s shoulder before he even finishes asking. Chanyeol tries to lower his body, adjusting their position in the cramped van, trying to make the younger comfortable. Kyungsoo hums before he snuggles closer to Chanyeol and pats his hand affectionately, clearly aware of Chanyeol’s intentions and approving of them. 

“You’re so comfortable, I like it,” Kyungsoo mumbles, words slurred, half incoherent. 

“Hmm, because it’s _my_ body, that means you like me, right?” 

Chanyeol smiles, waiting for his answer and bites his lower lip when he realizes his answer will never come. Judging by the soft snores he hears, Kyungsoo must have fallen asleep. It should mean nothing, but Chanyeol feels his heart clench painfully and the ugly feelings he has start gnawing at him again. He spends the rest of the ride to their hotel deep in thought.

♠️

22, April 2017

It’s another fanmeet, for Lotte this time. Chanyeol is really excited because even though it’s just another event, he can rest for awhile, just be himself and interact comfortably with the fans. Kyungsoo is standing beside him as usual, wearing a dark navy blue shirt, looking at ease and especially relaxed. They’re still standing and smiling politely when he sees the confetti, Chanyeol’s eyes widen. Because in between the usual white boring one some of them are pink and shaped like hearts. 

He quickly collects them, blowing them in the air around Kyungsoo and smiling giddily. Chanyeol knows he has gotten Kyungsoo and Jongin’s attention now. They’re watching him, so he picks up one heart shaped confetti and sticks it on his right eye before he does the same with his left. He turns to Kyungsoo, _’look at me, I’m making heart eyes to you’_ and expects Kyungsoo to ignore him like usual.

Except when the confetti falls, Chanyeol can see Kyungsoo’s fond smile directed at him, and he smiles back. Kyungsoo also helps him to stick the confetti back, “Here, just let me.” 

Chanyeol lets him, laughing because he can't see and the confetti falls again. The one on his left eye stays though, so Chanyeol makes a funny face and tries to blow it with his mouth, Kyungsoo laughing beside him all along. The heart shaped pink confetti falls and Chanyeol falls deeper for the other man.*

♦️️

Kyungsoo wakes up shortly after Chanyeol tries to pull out his phone from his back pocket. Chanyeol mentally slaps himself, watching for any sign of discomfort from the smaller man. But Kyungsoo just sits up straighter and blinks furiously like he’s trying to make sense of where he is, Chanyeol kinda misses the warmth already.

When Kyungsoo doesn't say anything, Chanyeol pokes him. “I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“Huh?” Kyungsoo stares at him like he’s just realized he’s not alone. “Oh. No, you didn’t. I just- I’m tired but my mind won’t let me sleep in peace.”

Chanyeol nods in understanding, they're all always restless after concerts, bodies tired but minds not able to shut up and thinking a mile a minute. Although now he thinks it’s kind of tolerable with time. Chanyeol has to direct a long shitty movie in his head and contemplate all his live decisions before he can fall asleep at night. Only to be woken up in what feels like second later to the sound of a blaring alarm, declaring that it’s already morning. 

“Jongin is snoring,” Kyungsoo points out. “He can sleep literally anywhere, anytime.”

 _‘It’s always Jongin’,_ he wants to say, but Chanyeol just reaches for his phone without a sound, he connects his white One Piece earbud to his right ear before pressing the play button. When the intro of Jamie Cullum’s Mind Trick begins to play Chanyeol pats his left shoulder, signaling for Kyungsoo to lean onto him again.

“You’re the best,” Kyungsoo says with a thankful smile before he gets back to his previous position.

Chanyeol listens to the song until the second refrain before his mind begins to drift away.

♣️

25, April 2017

Chanyeol has been restless since he finished his speech minutes ago. It’s the closing ment, that means the concert is coming to an end and they’ll leave this stage not long after the eight of them have said their piece. It’s Junmyeon’s turn now and Kyungsoo has been talking and joking happily with Jongin right beside him. Chanyeol dances to try and gain Kyungsoo’s attention but to no avail, the wide eyed man leans into Jongin’s space instead, trying to see what Jongin is pointing at on the white plushie he’s been carrying around. 

When Jongin steps forward to drop the plushie, Chanyeol quickly pushes his toy to Kyungsoo - the yellow one that he knows Kyungsoo likes. Kyungsoo takes it and Chanyeol feels his mood brighten. Then, he remembers the ring toy on his right hand and takes it off. It’s just a pure spontaneous act, he reaches for Kyungsoo’s left hand and puts it on the smaller man’s ring finger, embarrassed the second after.*

Only to stare confused when Kyungsoo ducks and drops the yellow toy which Chanyeol takes again instantly while his eyes wander around, trying to find another toy to keep Kyungsoo’s attention on him. But Kyungsoo takes off the ring, giving it back to Chanyeol and slipping it over his microphone sneakily and Chanyeol’s heart sinks. Chanyeol doesn't say anything and throws his gaze to the crowd, trying to hide his disappointment because, _Kyungsoo wore it for what, five seconds?_ *

Smiling to the crowd, Chanyeol remembers how Kyungsoo brushed him off earlier, when they were performing ‘Love Love Love’. Jongin had forgotten his line and laughed sheepishly, Kyungsoo poked him and laughed along, forgetting to give Chanyeol the microphone _again_. Sometimes Chanyeol likes to think Kyungsoo is doing it on purpose. Especially when Kyungsoo would laugh afterward, embarrassed and bump his forehead with Chanyeol’s as an apology with his hand resting on Chanyeol’s thigh, lingering. But this time Kyungsoo doesn't do any of that, he just directs his mic to Chanyeol before turning around and laughing with Jongin again. While Chanyeol keeps strumming his guitar, feeling oddly alone in the sea of people.*

—

_‘they say people come_  
 _they say people go_  
 _this particular diamond was extra special’_

“Kyungsoo?” The younger moves and Chanyeol regrets calling him right that second because, “You’re not asleep yet?”

“Nah, I’m just resting my eyes. What is it?”

_‘we swore on that night  
we'd be friends 'til we died’_

Chanyeol bites his lips. Suddenly, he remembers vividly what Kyungsoo said on his 20th birthday, ‘in next 10 years, 20 years, 30 years, 100 years, let's always be together’. He remembers that Kyungsoo once said that Chanyeol is his most comfortable _friend_ but Chanyeol feels like he’s gonna burst if he doesn't do - say - something.

_‘what I wouldn't give for just a moment to hold  
I live for this feeling, this everglow’_

He’s been declaring his love for Kyungsoo for _years_ ; the flowers, countless ‘i love you’s, teasing and rings, whispers and smiles. But Kyungsoo never wears their sound wave rings anymore and Chanyeol wonders if, earlier on the stage when Kyungsoo gave back the toy ring - rejecting another _ring_ \- actually means something or he’s just reading too much into things. 

Chanyeol whispers, “Kyungsoo? You know I love you, right?”

_‘so if you love someone, you should let them know’*_

“Of course Chanyeol-ah, you say it all the time.” Chanyeol’s heart hitches when Kyungsoo looks up and pets his hair, smiling openly, that kind of smile where his mouth turns into a full heart shape. But when Chanyeol stares into Kyungsoo’s eyes he finds nothing and realizes Kyungsoo doesn't get it. 

The van stops moving and Kyungsoo turns his attention to the window. Their manager is already opening the sliding door and calling them to step outside. Kyungsoo moves to get out from the van and Chanyeol catches his wrist. 

“Wait, Kyungsoo,” He calls pathetically. “You don't get it, _I love you._ ”

Kyungsoo halts in his step, his nose scrunching cutely before he smiles and answers easily, “Of course I get it. I love you too, okay?”

And Kyungsoo walks away, while he’s stuck, only staring longingly at Kyungsoo’s retreating back. It’s another form of rejection, and it stings. He should be used to it by now, but he’s not. Like usual, he’ll just cry in secret, weeping in grief. And when he looks into Kyungsoo's eyes the next morning, he’ll fall for him all over again.

♥️

Somewhere between 11th and 12th January, 2017

Chanyeol has been planning this day, he’s been carefully picking his words. He went as far as matching his phone’s time with Kyungsoo's. And then he waits, he waits until January comes. And then he waits, he waits until the 11th comes. He waits, and the clock strikes at midnight and he sends his carefully composed text to him. And Chanyeol waits, he waits for an answer.

_‘My friend Dooyoung, I mean Kyungsoo, happy birthday. Am I the first?’_

The little number beside his message shows it’s 12.00, he must be the first. Five minutes later and Kyungsoo still hasn't answer. The clock ticks into fifteen, twenty. Chanyeol stares, thinking that Kyungsoo must be asleep and starts to believe that he won't get any reply. And then it happens.

 _‘Yes, you’re in the first place Chanyeol-ah ㅋㅋ Thanks ❤️’_ ️

Kyungsoo’s answer come exactly twenty eight minutes after his message was sent and it’s short. Just an confirmation, a ‘yes, he’s the first’ and a simple ‘thanks’. But there's a little pink heart at the end of it that leaves Chanyeol confused. Because Kyungsoo dislikes messaging, he’s bad at replying and opts to call instead. Moreover, Kyungsoo _hates_ emoticons and Chanyeol pretty sure the heart shaped pink on his phone is an emoticon.

It feels oddly intimate and for a second he considers not uploading it to his Instagram. But Chanyeol's hand moves without his consent, already capturing their chat and uploading it on his account. Because he wants the world to see, this little insignificant proof that maybe Kyungsoo feels _something_ toward him. He inserts the heart shaped pink too on his caption, another declaration of love from him, Park Chanyeol to none other than Do Kyungsoo.

And then Chanyeol wishes for his heart, hopes when the morning comes it wouldn't harbor a bigger, futile, unrequited feeling to his heart shaped lips band mate. And Chanyeol waits.

 _‘I’m first place in your heart, right? Happy birthday, Kyungsoo-yah ❤’_ *

**Author's Note:**

> Footnote for the *(s);  
> 1\. Lotte Duty Free Fanmeet, [1](https://twitter.com/CHANSOONOTAS/status/855773748603039744) [2](https://twitter.com/nonchanchin/status/856190910618521600) [3](https://twitter.com/PCYHomeThaiLand/status/856522420500389888) [4](https://twitter.com/MellyTania277/status/855772896672628736)
> 
> 2\. Newark concert; [fighting for Kyungsoo’s attention](https://twitter.com/babydontlike/status/857101831754981378), [the ring thing](https://twitter.com/Chansoo_gifs/status/857073086117462016) & [Love Love Love](https://twitter.com/johadyo/status/857181273151995904)
> 
> 3\. The italic texts referring to the song playing on Chanyeol’s phone, it’s Coldplay’s Everglow 
> 
> 4\. Translated from [Chanyeol's Instagram post on Kyungsoo’s birthday](https://www.instagram.com/p/BPIRFTSDc8B/?hl=id)
> 
>  
> 
> talk to me on my [Twitter!](https://twitter.com/ininawaa?s=09)


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